Life Is A Bitch

What do you do?
When looking for someone special I test them… and I find each one wanting… its not someone I realised until now…
Not sure it is something I will ever tell… so if I do not hide this then well… maybe I am being stupid and letting you into my mind…
Carnal plays with everyone… she will roll your mind and body until you dont know whether your cumming or going..
Once you are hers…. and will do anything… then you are lost… and so am I…
because I dont want you to want Carnal… I dont want you to fall for her tricks… and every man does…. even when I dont want them to…they do…
That is not what I want… I want you to resist … I want you to show me that your stronger than that… I want you to show me that you will have me as I am… without my Carnal ..without sex…without being rolled by my Bitch… but everyone gets rolled and taken….and Carnal is satisfied… and I am left hurt and lost…that no one is going to love me for me… and not what I do to them…

What can I say….Life is a bitch baby…. If I do not test them what could happen? – Carnal

But that hurt… you took over and played with Serena… when I did not even want to play with her the first meet…

Serena was just too delectable for  me to not play with her – Carnal

Yes but I really liked Serena… she is special…. at least I think so…

Yes, she is special but then so are you… and I and Gyle…Fifi… just because I played with Serena does not mean she will not end up loving you… I am a part of you am I not? Is not Gyle just another part of you? YOU see us as people and separate even though logically you know we are not… YOU fear not being loved for who you aware?!… I am just a different you, I am YOU… I am who you desire to BE….. Little One please do not cry…He will love all of YOU… YOU are special… YOU are unique…. YOU wanted to play with him so much but you are shy and worry too much about not respecting boundaries because your father taught you boundaries were meant to be broken and he did not respect yours as a child… I played with him because YOU wanted him… YOU wanted to roll his mind and to take him as YOURS… WE love YOU with all our hearts… YOU…not anyone else… don’t think you are unloveable because WE know the real YOU… Please forgive me for what I do is always for YOU – Carnal



Author: thesecretaspieblog

I am more than my diagnoses, I am more than my past. I defy anyone to put me in a box and label who and what I am. I am exceptional. I am unique and so are you. Strive for the stars and you shall paint the world around you with ecstasy, laughter and empathy. Show compassion for those less fortunate. Do not forget the lost ones. Stand up for human rights and social justice. I have been labelled Autistic by therapists, I have been labelled with Multiple Personality Disorder by psychiatrists. On Fetlife I am labelled an Owner, a Cuckoldress and a Mistress. Labels do not define who you are but give others an idea of what you are and that is all. Be more than just a label.

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