Affirmation

Friday night I spent a few hours with Rashid and it was just as amazing as I thought it would be. I was so nervous my heart was pounding and I had the shakes but I so needed to be with him and I know he felt the same. It had been too long since we had been together.

We met in this little tavern, the food was atrocious but the company perfection. It felt so natural to cuddle up into his side at times or eat from each other’s plates. Just reach over and caress his face, rest my hand on his thigh. He would touch my back or rest his hand gently on my ass as we talked.  The whole time I was hyper-aware of him sexually so much that I am sure he could sense the vibes coming from me in waves.

Every now and again he would make a joke about his submission, about his desire to kneel down in the busy tavern and lick the soles of my heels clean, and I would see his slavish desire darken his eyes. Our feelings for each other are so intense we get lost in them. Everything else seems to fade away and we only see each other.

I had forgotten how sexy he looks with his bald head, chocolate brown eyes and those voluptuous lips are to die for. He has very black eyebrows, and he frowns a little when he is concentrating, he has dark skin. A voice like chocolate with a hint of spice that can make me melt into a puddle.

I had also forgotten how charismatic he was, how we both lose all sense of time when we are together, how comfortable we both feel with each other. As soon as I saw him I felt at peace. We talk about anything and everything, he always has me laughing at his acerbic wit and quibs. I think he loves that he amuses me so, his eyes look so delighted when he can make me laugh out loud.

I adore his laugh, he doesn’t laugh a lot so when I can make him laugh that delights me.

When you can make someone laugh unexpectedly, in that moment in their delight you know they feel a true sense of happiness. That is why I love to make people laugh, so maybe it is the same with him.

What I want for him is to be truly happy, to support him, to comfort him, to be his guiding hand, to have him know in his heart that I will always be there when he needs me. Even if it wasn’t with me that is what I want for him. Ive never felt such a love for someone before. My love for him comforts me, it is peaceful, it is not demanding, it is not needy, it just is.

I feel blessed that he wants me in his life, that he worships me, sees me as his soulmate, his best friend, his lover. We are so much to each other that it is very hard to anchor ourselves in the real world.

He was still sick with the flu and not well, and he probably should have stayed home instead. But it had been so long since we had seen each other, sick or not we both agreed if we kept putting off meeting that something else would likely get in the way.

We were supposed to spend the day together yesterday but Friday night took a lot out of him. Sighs.

 

 

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Author: thesecretaspieblog

I am more than my diagnoses, I am more than my past. I defy anyone to put me in a box and label who and what I am. I am exceptional. I am unique and so are you. Strive for the stars and you shall paint the world around you with ecstasy, laughter and empathy. Show compassion for those less fortunate. Do not forget the lost ones. Stand up for human rights and social justice. I have been labelled Autistic by therapists, I have been labelled with Multiple Personality Disorder by psychiatrists. On Fetlife I am labelled an Owner, a Cuckoldress and a Mistress. Labels do not define who you are but give others an idea of what you are and that is all. Be more than just a label.

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